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Subscribe to RSSJamie Grumet made headlines earlier this year for being featured on the cover of Time magazine breast-feeding her 3-year-old son. Grumet told TODAY that the cover photo was "intentionally provocative" and the publicity from it has given her the opportunity to bring attention to clean water charity Waves for Water.
Jamie Lynne Grumet became a cover girl this year without ever setting foot on a catwalk.
The infamous pose she struck in May for TIME Magazine, standing hand on hip while she breast-fed her 3-year-old son as he stood on a chair, landed her as much publicity as any supermodel.
After the cover was revealed, Grumet, 26, defended her choice to pose that way in an interview on the TODAY show, saying "We knew exactly what we were getting into."
TIME Magazine's controversial cover featuring Jamie Lynne Grumet.
When TODAY.com caught up with Grumet seven months later, she said she still carries no regrets about posing for TIME, but feels disappointed that the photo – and its provocative “Are You Mom Enough” tagline – overshadowed the story inside on attachment parenting.
“Any photo is subjective, so it’s up for interpretation. That’s just the way it goes," the Los Angeles-based mother of two told TODAY.com. "I’m more upset that people in the media have said that I regretted it, or that I was manipulated."
That’s why Grumet later posed for the cover of another magazine, "Pathways to Family Wellness," once again while breast-feeding her child Aram. But in that photo she sat cradling him in a more traditional position, joined by her husband and their other son, 6-year-old Samuel.
The fall edition of the quarterly magazine played off the TIME cover with its own headline: "Jamie Grumet: Mom Enough To Speak Out for Attachment Parenting."
“It was important for us to pose and say, ‘Hey, if we had creative control (with the TIME piece) we would have done it like this,’” Grumet said.
Grumet now tries to deflect any attention she gets for either cover to a charity she runs, the Fayye Foundation. She created the nonprofit group in November 2011 to help curb the orphan crisis in Ethiopia by empowering women and mothers.
Pathways to Family Wellness
Grumet’s older son was adopted from Ethiopia, where attachment parenting is the norm. “It’s totally normal to breast-feed there for years and years and years,” she said.
Her foundation’s latest project focuses on clean water – specifically, working to ensure that future generations in Ethiopia can find clean water sources nearby.
“It’s a completely solvable issue," she said. "Right now, women there are walking miles and miles to get water, and they are not going to school because of it."
Grumet makes regular trips to the African nation, and returned from her most recent visit in September.
When Grumet appeared on the TIME cover, the instant outrage and publicity over her photo crashed the website that hosts her blog, IAmNotTheBabySitter.com. She received more than 40,000 emails in the first day, most from reporters and bloggers around the world seeking comment.
Grumet soon found herself being criticized from both sides.
Courtesy of Jamie Lynne Grumet
Grumet on a trip to Ethiopia for her charity.
Strong supporters of attachment parenting — a method that encourages parents to sleep with young children in their beds, extend breast-feeding beyond toddler years and adhere to other techniques to help develop parent-child bonds — felt slighted by what turned into negative publicity for the cause. But Grumet also got fierce criticism from the opposite end of the parenting spectrum, from those who felt it inappropriate to promote public breast-feeding.
A TODAY.com poll at the time about the TIME cover generated votes from more than 131,000 people. An overwhelming 73 percent said, “Eh, I don’t really want to see that,” while 27 percent thought, “It’s great!”
“Look, I’m not an advocate of breast-feeding, but I’m an advocate for normalizing it,” Grumet said.
“I think a lot of people wanted me to be crazy or extreme,” she acknowledged, saying she received 12 offers to be on reality shows, and handfuls of calls regarding prospective book deals or product endorsements.
“It was so ridiculous. You just don’t make money off of being an advocate or activist. That would be really, really wrong and hurtful to what we were trying to do,” she said. “A reality show? That would have been exploitative, for sure.”
Courtesy of Jamie Lynne Grumet
In the end, Grumet said she and her husband, a police officer, have learned a lot from the experience and laugh quite a bit at the response it generated. “We’re secure in who we are,” she said.
And for those wondering, she no longer breast-feeds Aram, now 4. "He's done," she said with a laugh.
Today, Grumet works primarily on home-schooling her two boys and on her charity. She is currently planning her next trip to Ethiopia.
“It’s funny, people would say things like, ‘Look, you’re a magazine cover,’ or, ‘Look, you’re a Halloween costume,’ or something like that. But that’s not me,” she said. “That’s why we were able to not take it personally, because that picture was just this persona. It wasn’t me. It was never us. It was just an image that people were filtering through their own views and own life experiences.”
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There is absolutely nothing wrong with breastfeeding a child, even at age three. What was the commotion about? Growing up in many countries overseas (US Army brat) I saw breastfeeding in public often. Store, park, theaters... so what? You couldn't see the breast, kids have to eat. Seriously, what's America's hang up with this natural event of life?!
She is quite the inspiration, for her charity work as well as her AP advocacy!
I think breast-feeding till age 3 or later is a little bit extreme. I understand some people do that, along with sleeping in the bed with the child. I am dealing with an ex who does this now with our son and it makes me sick. I want my son to grow up independent and strong and feeling that all these "nuturing" tools take away from the truth, he is growing up and is a big boy now. Sleep in your big boy bed, eat real big boy food with your big boy fork, knife, and spoon. It is about time to cut the umbilical cord ladies and let our kids grow up.
I heard that she was the one doin some suckin' on the childs pee pee...it was what she called 'new age sex ed'...
LOL!
And this is one example of how a negative impact was made.
It's called having some respect for the people around you ladies and some freakin class. You're like the fat dude behind you in a restaurant that @!$%#s in his pants while passing gas. It's gross and I don't care how natural it is, if you had a decent education you would know that taking a @!$%# is natural too but not appropriate in public. I'm surrounded by idiots!
Gary, I think the hang up is that so many of these women lack class when breast feeding. I breast fed my kids (till 6 months, no teeth please), but that Time magazine photo was DISGUSTING. I wanted to throw up. Even though I breast fed I don't want to see women hanging their tits out in public. It would not be such a big deal if they showed some respect and class for the people around them by covering up. I used the same 4'x5' cloth to cover then it double as a cover to protect my clothes when they needed to be burped. You're not making a point if all that we can see is how much of white trash you really are.
You should probably change your screen name because with a narrow-minded attitude like yours, you most certainly are not and do not represent every woman.
Wow, it's gross? You actually breast fed and you still equate taking a dump with feeding a child? I breast fed and covered up because that's what was comfortable for me, but to judge and call people names? You've got some pent-up hostility you should look into. White trash? Really? Lacking class?
Perhaps "angrywoman" would describe you better.
I think you are an impostor, @everywoman. I've never heard a woman "speak" like you did above
Very sad view. If a baby eating is so disgusting to you? Perhaps you should never leave your home.
Wow! You are one classy lady everywoman. I don't believe that I've heard the term "dude" used since Bill and Ted's excellent adventure! As far as getting a decent education goes, it might surprise you to learn that most women that breastfeed in the United States are college educated. I happen to be a major in the US Air Force flying a 120 million dollar aircraft. Aparently someone thinks I've gotten myself a decent education! Have I breastfed in public? You bet! Do I let my boobs hang out like a 1970's National Geographic centerfold? No, because I'm feeding my child not working the crowd for beads at Mardi Gras!
I have to agree with Everywoman, but you really can't say that out loud because everyone that breastfeeds takes it as a personal attack against them and become extremely belligerent and downright abusive to anyone that doesn't agree with them.
Yes, your child has to eat, but why is it so important that you do it in the most public way possible? And this woman: having a three-year-old hanging from your breast is a bit ridiculous. That kid is going to be stuck with her decision forever. You can breast feed in public without the rest of us having to see your breast. Put a blanket over it or buy the special shirts. Believe me, you'll live. No one is attacking you, we are simply asking that you recognize that this world isn't just your personal space. Others occupy it, too.
Seriously, this is not a cause at all. Being banned from marrying because of your orientation is a cause. Not being able to vote or go to school because of your race or gender is a cause. Wanting your breast out in public is not a cause. This is the saddest excuse of 1st world "revolution" that I've seen.
And I've got $50 that the replies will be angry, defensive and belligerent against anyone that doesn't agree with the public breastfeeders.
Well said, Human-4637934!!
I applaud her courage and chutzpah! Jimmy, I nursed my son until just before 3 and he is a healthy, independent young man today. He never slept in a crib and my daughter did only for a short while and they have not been "attached at the hip for a very long time." As a matter of fact they were quite secure and independent earlier than some of their same age relations who were allowed to "cry it out" to "toughen them up to the harsh world out there" and had fewer issues as they grew up.
Attachment parenting is loving, supportive, and enriches a child's early experience. The "big boy bed" will still be there when your son is 4-5. How sad that you think your son at 3 is to old for nurturing. There is lots of time for independence, competition, and testosterone driven activities. I don't think everyone needs to be going around with their breasts hanging out nursing toddlers, but Mrs. Grumet was trying to bring attention to an important issue and hopefully make a positive impact.
The point of contention is that she did not make a positive impact, and succeeded in making a very negative impact in some respects.
Some women have class, some don't! This woman doesen't. What a mother!
so if I didn't breast feed my kids till they were 4 & sleep w/them till them were teenager's they don't grow up independent?! Sorry not true. When I was young my mother went around breast feeding not covering up & I thought it was the most disgusting & embarrassing thing. I swore I would never breast feed & didn't.
Too bad the husband's too stupid to realize his co-worker's now know what his wife's breasts look like now. Not something I would want my friends to know.
Not to breast-feed at all is not an optimum solution.
Well the kid on the cover looks old enough to feed himself. It is actually a bit disturbing, almost incestuist. Then the other cover she looks so smug you just want to slap her. Sorry if the kid is old enough to walk, talk and have a brain enough to feed himself then he should be doing it. Your only prolonging a childs development by babying him as long as you can. A bit selfish I would say.
Why does she have to go to Ethiopia to adopt a child? Love these folks, that want to save the world but do nothing to give back to the country that allowed them to prosper. Ever considered moving to Ethiopia?
For those who want to consider this fact, the fact is that no other animal in the world continues to breast-feed their young when the young have gotten their teeth.
Also,the woman is completely right that a young child still needs nurturing and that it is wrong that some believe that this ceases to be necessary. But something is wrong when she (and her husband), do not seem to understand all of the meanings that their images are communicating.
And many psychologists disagree with the sleeping with a child, atleast on a routine basis.
That is grossly untrue. In fact the reason our baby teeth are called "milk teeth" is because the natural weaning age is equal to when the baby teeth fall out. Primates are one such example of animals that continue to nurse after teeth come in. There are extensive studies on this. You can read some from Dr. Katherine Dettwyler.
There are countless doctors and studies that support attachment theory and this style of parenting. Families around the world share family beds and if you look at the countries where this is most prominent you will see no significant correlation between independence and sleeping arrangements. In fact you find children are quite capable of developing their own independence and forming/sustaining close nurturing bonds with families.
“It was so ridiculous. You just don’t make money off of being an advocate or activist. That would be really, really wrong and hurtful to what we were trying to do,” she said. “A reality show? That would have been exploitative, for sure.”
And she thinks posing for TIME magazine and Pathways to Family Wellness isn't exploitative?
So at what age would this be considered inappropriate?
I guess it was a slow news day so they had to dredge up this stupid article for a second time.
Quite entertaining to read all the righteous judging going on... My hope is that one day people can mange their life, their children's life without being judged and perhaps they in turn will do the same. Is it the times we live in that so many people think their way is the only way and if not their way it is wrong. The best thing for this planet is to have a mandantory relocation for everyone on the planet and you don't get to choose your destination, then you have to adjust and hopefully get out of your self righteousness.
I breastfed until my child's natural weaning. I'm glad I did. I've talked to women who forced weaned, and, they go through a form of physical & hormonal hell I'm glad I missed. I've since met several women who are also trying. We had no idea it takes so long (3-5 yrs) for a human child to self wean...no one knew...in fact...in my case...it seemed my breastfeeding my kid was a major divisive issue in the family...I got booted. I didn't fit.
This is the first year my kid has had to face viruses all alone...and...me, too. You see, breastfeeding helps the mom, too. More than most women will ever know because they bought the line 'can feeding and holding is just as good as breastfeeding,' but, every parent I know that can feeds simply cannot wait until their baby can hold the bottle themselves...
I see the generations of never breastfed children...working on the fourth generation in my family. Poor people with mom's too 'busy' or too 'selfish' to breastfeed their very own babies.
And, yes, I do hear the horrible tales of mommies who tried and tried, but couldn't. But, considering it took me and my NICU baby four months to learn to breastfeed on our own? I guess, I look to the fact that most US women can't be bothered to breastfeed as a problem on their part...and...I see most of them carry around their multiple pregnancies on their bodies the rest of their lives, and, I know what these women have missed. These women missed a chance at millions of years of benefits (or the god one happens to believe in created benefits) for their bodies all because...no good reason really....I mean...what modern woman would want to breastfeed when there is paid work to be done?
I accidentally hit "like" the computer page was refreshing. I meant to hit reply. There was no "like" to your commentary. Here is my reply: According to you, anyone that doesn't subscribe to your type of parenting is a terrible person. Keep telling yourself that. It's not about the child not being ready to let go, it's you. YOU want to keep that attachment. YOU don't want to let that next stage of development occur.
And as to the feature mother in this article, I'm willing to bet that Ethiopian women are prolonging breastfeeding because of the lack of FOOD, not because of some 1st world suburban mentality about parenting. I am disgusted that she would even go there.
I'm very saddened by the comments as well as the backlash from it being made public the first time. Not everyone is going to agree on a parenting style. Not everyone is going to like what someone else is doing. As a BFing mother I cover up because the people around me would be uncomfortable. My daughter HATES the cover, she likes to see me and the world around her, but we do it so people around us aren't uncomfortable. It's sad that is the case. Women walk around showing more breast in certain bathing suits and shirts than this woman did on the magazing cover. Walk past a Victoria's Secret lately? Or how about a teenage clothing store? Society teaches our daughters, our young women, that BFing in public, feeding your child the way our bodies were intended, is disturbing or gross, but letting half of your bottom hang out of your skirt, or showing so much cleavage they are about to fall out of your shirt is ok? Is that really the message we want to be sending our children? Stop focusing on attacking each other. Get over the article and go talk to your children. Teach them some values and respect. Our world would be better off if the focus was more on ourselves or our children and not the ridiculous media or other peoples business.
I respect individual choices, but, as I read her comments about how the Time Cover was not really her family but just a "persona" - give me a break. She also says she didn't really think the photo would be perceived as it was, with her attitude and her son's look on his face, but, she did pose for that, right? Did they change the shot? I think not. It is what it is and she got what she wanted - attention. People are so starved for attention, especially when they know they are doing something that society may see as strange, so what do they do? Put it out there, then whine about people not respecting their choices. I don't even know who you are - do I care what you do at your house - no. I do care that you put your son's face out there for your own selfish purposes - it amazes me how parents don't think before they put their kids out in public like that. You could have talked about this with the photos, but you wanted to get reactions and you did, but remember this. When this boy gets bullied for this, it will be YOUR fault. Way to put your child out there Mom. No amount of breastfeeding will save him from that. Oh wait, you're homeschooling - I guess that cuts out the bullies then, huh? Pretty sneaky sis.
I meant she could have talked about this WITHOUT the photos (first time making a comment and I forgot to edit).
Most of the cultures that breastfeed forever and have communal beds also physically hit their children as a form of discipline. I ain't no betting woman - but I would gamble my annual income that these pseudo intellectual parents who are extreme advocates of attachment parenting - with such parent superiority vigor- do not also adhere to the other long standing norms of these cultures such as spanking/corporal punishment as a means of discipline. Guess according to the these modern day "attachment gurus" these cultures got the attachment part right but then ruined it all and permanently scarred their off-spring when they entered the discipline phase of child rearing.
She is home schooling her children. Good Lord - help us all. Her limited intellectual ability is obvious - from her decision making skills (posing on the Time Cover; home schooling her children) to her pseudo-intellectual views on parenting. Attachment is a natural bond and outcome that occurs when you raise a child in a normal (void of abuse) home. To actively create an environment that will create the bond is just missing the point all together. Kind of like living your life trying to create happiness - it is a by-product of other things - not a goal you aim for directly. Attachment is a naturally occuring phenomenon between parents and children and those parents who seek to actively create it have missed the boat entirely.
I would have run away from home as soon as I could if I had a parent like her. As long as I was not still dependent on her breasts for survival.